To Do or Be by Evanshale Knightly

The dirt road stretched in front of me, the trees loomed over as if watching me intently. I kicked the red dust up, launching pebbles into the ditch. Through my head ran curses and profanity to match my ill temper. Not a sound came out of the trees, not even a slight flutter from the breeze. I couldn't contain my anger for being judged by people who knew me not. Yet, rumors flew out of the mouths of many strangers. Looking up at the sky, I watched the clouds billow by. They seemed to float in their own distinct shapes, not caring of what went around them.
Slowly I walked into the greenery, following a footpath carved by deer. I soon came across a circle of rocks, shielded by dense trees. It was my oasis. A place to make my own world come alive. I lay across a boulder, staring up at the sky. I lost myself to my world, and finally found some peace. Thoughts incomprehensible to a stranger flooded through my brain. I felt that no one would ever understand me and my world. Was I destined to be the joke? The one who was slandered, taken aback by sneers and whispers? Would I ever find the acceptance of my existence that my soul so desperately longed for? So many questions, and not enough answers.
Soon into my stupor of thought, I passed out upon my rock. It was so peaceful with the gentle breeze of fall rustling through the leaves like a sweet lullaby. My head whirled and soon dreams took over, In my dream a raven came to me, feathers as black as night.

"Why do you sit and mope upon that rock?" he crowed.
"Why do you sit upon that limb and pry?" I said staring intently into his bead-like eyes.
"I fly around from time to time, watching the world go by. Never had I seen someone so glum over something petty."
"Well how would you respond to someone slandering you?" I narrowly retorted.
"I respond by going about my business without a care in the world. Us ravens are always slandered, as nothing but mere pests that attack corn. No one yet, that I have met, has ever complemented our feathers, or our faithfulness to our mates. The world like to point out our flaws so that they may seem brighter or more superior. In truth, they are the ones that should mourn their insecurities, for that won't get them far. For me I will continue to fly above this earth, and go about my way. For whom do I have to please? The Lord made me this way. If one cannot accept that, then why keep their company?"
"I guess I have not a need to mope, if I am happy to be myself" I spoke softly glancing downward.
"I notice you from time to time here, often deep in thought. You smile then. Why should you stop now?"
"I smile here for no one can judge me, or cast a sneer to my countenance. I smile because I am myself. I am truly at peace."
"So why not make this heaven ad incorporate it to your hell?"
"You mean I should live and share my world to those who do not understand?"
"Who could understand a story they have not been told?"
"And if they ridicule me?"
"Then fly above and beyond. You have nothing to gain from a bad audience, but you may find someone in your search. Someone may appreciate your beautiful smile and see the beauty of the world you understand" he crowed as he turned to fly off and away.
"Raven?"
He turned his head and peered at me curiously.
"I love the colors of your feathers, they match your lovely eyes."
He crowed with a twinkle in his eye, and flew off into the wind, disappearing as if his existence never was. Then the wind began to whirl , leaves cycloned around me, and then my eyes were opened.
I blinked back tears, staring off into the wood. The Raven's words still rang into my ears and my soul sided with them. Only one thought circled my brain, and that was to let go. I decided then to let myself go about my merry way. I would first have to accept myself in reality, before I was to expect acceptance from outsiders. Then I realized I should follow my abundance of character, unyielding to observation. For what is a life of hiding like you are ashamed of yourself?
In the distance, I heard a raven crow. I smiled to myself and went back to watching the clouds roll by, significantly happier, wrapped in the bliss of self discovery. The world could go on and sneer, but I would be. I'd let it be.

I love how you put your emotion into the work.

Thank you.... This actually was written because of personal experience. I am glad you appreciate it!